Friday, November 23, 2007

I Need A Good Comeback

So, I just returned from a trip to the Woodcraft Store to pick up supplies. As I was entering the store, an old dude said to me as he was leaving "Your husband said he'll take one of everything." Obviously, he thought I was there to pick up something for my hubby and never considered that I might be a woodworker.

Now, let's look at how many ways that statement does not apply to me:
1. I've been a woodworker for 15 years.
2. I have a workshop that makes grown men cry.
3. I teach classes at the Woodcraft Store.
4. I frequently give demos/presentations to the two woodworking clubs to which I belong.
5. I'm the president of our local woodworking club.
6. I'm GAY.

Granted, I'm workin' the middle-aged soccer mom look pretty hard, but jeez! I get this sometimes from guys, not as much as when I was younger, and it forever catches me off-guard. I usually just smile in my befuddlement, but I'd love to have a funny comeback. Any suggestions?


Presbyfruit's History Bits said...

1. "Why, I OUGHTTA..."
2. "Well, God bless you too!"
3. Cough, while saying, "Homo says what?"
4. "My 'husband' wears lipstick and women's panties, and wouldn't know a dremel tool from a dreidel."

Kari Hultman said...


Shazza said...

I like #4!!!!

Unknown said...

I was going to add one but number four looks like a winner to me.

Kari Hultman said...

#4 would make a great tshirt.

Anonymous said...

The only tool my husband has is seldom used and hard to find!

Kari Hultman said...

Clever! I have quite an arsenal of good comebacks now. THANKS!

Identity Mixed said...

Laughing too hard to come up with a witty comeback!

Anonymous said...

1. Your wife called and wanted me to build her an entertainment unit.

2. Your wife asked me which tool she could use since the Viagra isn't working.

3. Ask him how he would build a period Chester County Hanging cupboard? I wasn't sure if I would use handcut dovetails on the Carcass and the drawers or handcut mortise and tenon on the carcass with handcut dovetails on the drawers? My biggest problem is that I'm not sure which workbench I am going to use since all four of them have a piece of furniture I'm building on them.

4. Just say SHE hates tools, besides I build all my tools to build all my projects. I just came in for the calendar!

5. Oh, I thought this was the sex shop. OOPs

6. What was that, Yes I use the scary sharp method on my chisels. Did you want me to show you how?

7. That's funny! I am on break from teaching a class on how to make handplanes. Did you need to learn something today?

Kari Hultman said...

HA! Those are great! I'm taking you with me the next time I go to Woodcraft. ; )

Kevin T. Keith said...

"Actually, my girlfriend told me to get whatever I want, because I'm the one who knows woodworking."

Anonymous said...

Say only: "Taiaio is my husband. He loves me. And he loves all my woodworking classes. He is the master, but he says I'm the Big Master."

With love, Taiaio.